Saturday, December 20, 2008

Where is my star?

It has been a while since I tried to appreciate nature around me. And it has been a while too since I last stared at the sky above me at night. With a cigarette lit, I noticed how empty the sky is – no stars, no clouds, only pit darkness clasping my cold arms from a distance. This state saddens me in many ways as if the sky embodied my fortitude. Where did all the stars go? I wonder if the stars will ever go back to bestow glitter it once did when I was a kid; this I wonder as I inhaled more smoke inside my lungs. It felt better for a while as if there is no pain. Only a fool can fool himself, they say. But I’d rather be a fool than to let the tenderness in me show.

Where did all the stars go? Are they on the other side of the sky where life is filled with hues? How can I get there? Is it by a few steps or by a mile from where I am? I remember being there ages ago. It was warm, accepting and gentle. I was there being cared for.

Where is my star? Let me reach it with my bare and trembling hand. Is there enough time to wait or time was whipped unknowingly?

Is that my star? This I asked a stranger. With a pale look the stranger answered, you left them for my taking. They now glitter for me.
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